Strawberries
by Cosmomos
Summary: After a performance that leaves Murdoc in the epitome of guilt, he invites someone into his heart for the evening. It just so happens 2D is a good listener. (2doc fluff, one shot.)


**A/N:** **This one shot was heavily inspired by the Highsnobiety interview with 2D. If you haven't seen Murdoc and 2D's interviews, I recommend you read them, they're golden. Please leave a review if you enjoyed!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Gorillaz or the cover image.**

 **Rated T: for strong language and a little angst.**

* * *

 **Strawberries**

When 2D performed songs such as these, the whole world would freeze and then, it would melt. His voice had such a rich golden tone to it and even after years of vocal abuse and age, his voice was forever something to behold when he'd lull out a track such as _Tomorrow Comes Today, Stop the Dams_ or _Broken_. Don't even get started on _Amarillo_ …

Tonight it so happened to be a fresh Gorillaz song: _Busted and Blue._ This song was particularly special because it was at heart, a romantic song which was a deep uncharted area for the band. The lyrics were to describe the dangerous attachment to technology. Because it had to and there was a certain image that Gorillaz needed to attain after all. But with eerie, amorous tones of the music and the thick emotion in 2D's voice as he sang, there was no other category to slot this neat little beauty besides the decadent "romance" section.

2D was also the mastermind behind the lyrics. He was arguably less political than his band mates being the most simple-minded one. When Murdoc was drunk enough to let a song written by the singer slip into their albums, it was sure to be the most tranquil and liberal track of the list. Busted and Blue was rapidly becoming a fan favourite and it hadn't occurred to the bassist why until he witnessed the song in person, 2D's face beneath one blue spotlight, small strands of cobalt hair clinging to a light layer of sweat on his forehead and those eyes… Orphic and ebony, void of everything besides the angst.

" _...All my life_

 _All my life_

 _Be my light_

 _On me, I am a satellite_

 _And I can't get back without you_

 _Be my love…"_

This song was another door to his soul. The audience could feel it, the whole band could feel it.

This was the first time Murdoc had bothered to hear 2D sing this live, in the flesh; it was certainly different to the dimmed-down studio version that everyone had been going bananas over. The studio finish didn't quite capture the hoarseness in his throat, the way his slender manicured fingers caressed the microphone stand or the moments where his eyes fluttered closed and his lips quivered.

" _...Weightless and fall on your body_

' _Til we're invisible_

 _I'm with you throughout it, choose_

 _Busted and Blue…"_

Upon the last haunting note, 2D released his gentle clutch on the microphone, exhaling slowly. The magic had died, the song was over and the crowd's loud intrusive screaming drowned out the ghostly atmosphere of 2D's graceful ending. He opened his eyes and gazed a few yards beside him at Murdoc who was sheltered from the spotlight. The cheering drowned out into white noise and the gaze could not be demolished.

Murdoc's breath hitched in his throat and he felt a sharp ache protrude from his chest. Throughout the man's life, he found that no one could make him feel anything. No shame, no guilt, no love, no joy. But _music_ , music made him feel everything. From this solemn exchange of mismatched eyes against black marble, he felt 2D and he felt his lyrics. Instantly he knew, this song was about him.

No sooner was the eye contact made it was broken and so was the uncomfortable twang of pain in Murdoc's chest. What a way to end a brilliant show, on a thoughtful and melancholy note and the band leader's unreadable expression had morphed into that of pride and satisfaction as he took a long stride into centre stage, nudging 2D with little thought and lolling his tongue out at the jeering crowd.

"Thank you!" He grinned into the microphone "we're Gorillaz and this has been an absolute belter so cheers, you've been a lovely bunch!"

The audience squealed above their lungs and a sea of arms rose up to the sky as Russel harpooned his drumsticks like a bride's bouquet and Noodle swayed her arms and hips in excitement, guitar pointing to the heavens.

2D stood awkwardly beside Murdoc for a while, rubbing his arm where he had elbowed him before bearing a large toothy grin and waving one lanky arm before him.

Murdoc watched him for a moment intently, faded bruises and age framing the singer's face as he smiled like a crescent moon with dimples like craters. All Murdoc could see was that spotlight cascading on him and that voice, soft and beautiful drowning out the noise and then him, those eyes, that face, glowering at him from across the stage.

Despite the attempt to get back into the gritty, almost lustful mood of the show, the last track had truly brought Murdoc down a notch and it was going to take without a doubt, a very long and drunken night to get that gaze out of his head.

 **…**

A few hours later the band mates had retired for the night to their trailers. Each member had their own courtesy of Murdoc's insists. but the majority ended up huddled inside just one together to eat, practice and bask in each other's company. Murdoc joining the group was a rare occurrence as everyone knew on tour that the bassist's Winnebago was off limits and so was his appearance for that matter. Unless you were a tall bird with a willing pair of hands and legs, you wouldn't find yourself in Murdoc's Winnebago. Sometimes out of pity he might invite 2D and Russel to come and drink with him (leaving Noodle out because he still somewhat saw her as his little untainted girl) but usually Russel would prefer the guitarist's company and so it would end up just Murdoc and 2D ossified and alone together which then usually ends up in a heated brawl. Murdoc always won and 2D always left with a large job for his makeup artist to cover up. Most of the time 2D wouldn't even fight back, he'd just take it and perhaps that aggravated Murdoc even more.

However, tonight was not the usual night.

2D, Russel and Noodle were, coincidentally, slurping noodles together in Russel's trailerwhich was appropriately pristine and white, drum accessories, posters and a delectable collection of bomber jackets adorning the vehicle. The trio were curled up closely together watching an old Japanese title that Noodle had picked out, with subtitles, much to 2D's dismay.

"My eyesight ain't tha' great" 2D whined after a while and Noodle nudged him.

"My English wasn't great but you didn't see me complaining" she giggled condescendingly.

After 2D had cleaned his bowl he hugged his knees close to his chest and watched the black and white figures dance across the screen though slightly blurry. He'd considered wearing glasses before but it didn't go well with his image, his rather unusual eyes were quite popular amongst the fans and he wanted to embrace them. There was worse things that could've happened to his face.

"You look thoughtful" Noodle pointed out quietly. 2D raised his thick brows then nestled his chin against his bony knees, pondering his performance earlier.

"I am" he admit.

"What's up, D?" Russel interjected, turning the volume down on the TV.

2D sighed and turned to his side. It was crazy how one could have thousands of eyes glaring at him on stage and feel brilliant but with his family gazing at him worriedly, he'd never felt so anxious.

"I'm fine I just…" his voice trailed off and he felt two hands of different sizes stroke his shoulder. He loved them.

"I'm jus' tired" he lied. It was easier to do that when he wasn't facing them. "I fink I'm gonna get a migraine."

Russel made a sympathetic tut and Noodle nod up at her large friend. The whole band was painfully aware of how excruciating 2D's migraines could get, hence the excess of painkillers and various assorted medication that followed in the singer's wake. Even if 2D was milking his chances of escaping his family's concern, he certainly made a good actor.

"Get some sleep, okay?" Russel suggested quieter now with the false knowledge that his friend had a splitting headache.

"Mm" 2D nod and continued to look anywhere but their faces as he head for the door. Noodle hugged him and said goodnight before he left Russel's Winnebago, out in the bitter cold of England and the black night lit only by street lamps in the distance and the stars that peeked through dull clouds.

The wind was lapping at his bangs softly as he reached in his pocket for a fag and a lighter, curling in on himself for warmth.

No sooner had he began his journey to his own vehicle, he was stopped by some rather hostile security guards, their tight grip practically snapping 2D's twig-like arms as they dragged his long clumsy legs across the gravel.

"G-get off!" 2D demanded, writhing in their grip. The two men ignored his protests and proceeded to haul the poor man towards a more neglected looking Winnebago that 2D of course recognised as Murdoc's. Before he had a chance to ask the guards why he was dragged here like a piece of meat, they let him go and gave him a slight push towards the door.

"Murdoc wants to see you" they told him rigidly and 2D stared at them, scratching the back of his neck in a mixture of anger and confusion.

"Could'a told me…" he frowned at the sight of them as they marched away into the darkness. What an odd occurrence.

2D glared at the door before him as if it were the gate to Hell itself; to be fair, that wasn't far from the truth either. Questions were racing through his mind like why would Murdoc ask for him here? Surely the satanist would be busy either caressing a rum glass or an hourglass, like a green pirate on wheels. Perhaps he wanted a drinking buddy again? That was slightly exciting and also slightly terrifying with the knowledge of how those sessions usually ended…

Eventually, 2D mustered the courage to knock on Murdoc's door, waiting for it to open and Murdoc to snatch him inside via the collar, into a stagnant room with a ready-made bottle of alcohol for his partner and Black Sabbath or Chuck Berry blasting through the walls of the entire Winnebago as Murdoc invited him to join the lunatic dance. But no such things happened. 2D heard a muffled response from inside and took it as his invitation.

The bluenette emerged into a thick cloud of smoke, undertone aromas of rum and sweat were chucked in the mix too. Surprisingly it wasn't an unpleasant smell to 2D, in fact years ago he'd began associating it with home and ever since, nothing like a strong cigarette and shot of whiskey relieved his homesickness when he was on tour.

"Ah, faceache" a voice rumbled.

No girls were anywhere to be seen which was strange to behold since it was common knowledge to the band that Murdoc took full advantage of the female attention on tour and it wouldn't be the first time that his singer had walked in on a graphic scene or any of the kind.

2D glided towards Murdoc cautiously, aware of the opaque and oppressive atmosphere that had settled between the two and making an effort not to trip on Murdoc's books and rubbish. Murdoc was perched against his bed on the filthy carpet with El Diablo nestled in his lap as he entertained a bottle of rum in his claws and a fag between his lips. Like usual he was dressed in nothing but a pair of jeans, the zip undone and disregarded.

"Uh…" 2D cleared his throat and twiddled his fingers together nervously. "You uh, wanted to see me, Muds?"

Murdoc arose ungracefully like a corpse from where he lay, his bass and rum forgotten on the floor and he stumbled a little towards 2D who instinctively reached out to catch him, placing his shaky hands protectively on Murdoc's shoulders and holding him up.

Murdoc growled, baring his razor-sharp teeth as he swatted the help away and leant against the wall instead, narrowing his eyes at the mortified singer who took a wary step back. Something in Murdoc's expression softened and he let out a long sigh, sliding to the floor once again and boring his eyes into the ground.

"Just stay with me, okay?" He slurred quietly and if 2D wasn't mistaken he swore he could hear the onset of a sob in the back of his friend's throat. The taller of the two stood artlessly, glancing around for something to say, something to do until he felt a strong hand yank his high-waisted trousers, pulling the singer to the ground with a thud.

"Drink" Murdoc ordered, kicking the rum towards his partner. 2D wasn't a big fan of rum, he found it too strong and pungent but regardless, he couldn't say no to Murdoc so he took a long swig of the foul liquid as his eyes fluttered closed and he swallowed, shivering when the liquid burned down his throat. After a few sips it became easier to ingest and well, at least Murdoc looked pleased.

In the corner of his eye, 2D noticed something else beside them on the floor. Something vibrant and fresh that didn't quite fit the gross feng shui of the otherwise dull and dirty room. A carton of fat, juicy strawberries were glistening in the yellow light and they looked pretty inviting. Never mind where Murdoc found such a treat.

"Can I…" 2D gestured towards the berries and grinned in delight when Murdoc pushed the lot towards him.

"Help yourself, dullard."

2D nibbled on the succulent fruits as Murdoc swished his rum in the bottle, watching it with a bored expression and reaching over to snag a strawberry of his own.

"Can I tell you a story, mate?" he began, a small sadness growing through his intoxication. 2D hadn't quite had enough to drink to feel tipsy yet but his nerves around Murdoc had definitely died down he couldn't tell whether that was due to the sickly taste of rum on his tongue or the fact that possibly the most cold and hostile person he knew was before him, clearly depressed and vulnerable.

"Yeah" 2D finally replied through a mouthful, clutching his knees to his chest once again then waiting patiently for Murdoc to form some kind of coherent sentence. For a long while there was silence where Murdoc fixed his eyes sternly on the carpet, inhaling nicotine like it was oxygen, preparing himself to let a lot of things off his chest that he'd rarely had. If ever.

"Once after one of my… ehhh _puppet_ shows at age ten, my old man pat me on the back, beer in hand. I'd never seen the bastard so proud. He was smiling at me like I was… Special or some bollocks." Murdoc paused to take another toke on his coffin nail, still avoiding eye contact with 2D who's eyes were wide and transfixed on the man before him.

"I made a big mistake that night. I told my dad that I loved him and that ol' pat on the back turned into a fist to the face. Knocked me out cold on the ground, into reality and there he looked down on me and said something that's _always_ stuck with me since. He said 'feelings are weakness and a Niccals lad won't be weak.' He followed that with some insults hm… _Faceache, baghead._ He hated me."

2D had the intense urge to crouch forward and wrap his arms around Murdoc, stroke his back and squeeze him; tell him that it would be okay and that his father couldn't have _hated_ him but he couldn't possibly anticipate the kind of reaction he'd receive with Murdoc in this state. 2D knew that his counterpart had a rough childhood to say the least and a father who humiliated him but never had he heard the words pour from Murdoc's own mouth like this. It broke his heart.

"Murdoc…" 2D uttered, his hands itching to reach out and comfort him. He was so taken aback by Murdoc's honesty and hadn't ever imagined he'd be in the dominant position between them. Usually the singer would be reduced to tears and cowardice and Murdoc would leer above him but tonight was different and despite all the crap Murdoc had put him through, the bruises, the insults, the inconsistency throughout the years that they'd been together, 2D couldn't find it in his heart to hold it against the man who had kept the band going this long.

"Can I touch you?" 2D asked shyly, a bold question at that. Murdoc hesitated for a moment before he gave in with a small reluctant nod and flinched once he felt 2D's hand on his shoulder, soothing gentle circles into his bare skin and eventually with silent consent, 2D snaked his fingers through the greasy mop of raven hair, tucking it behind his slightly pointed ears and massaging his scalp.

Murdoc groaned inaudibly in appreciation and ever so slightly leaned into the soft touch, feeling the tension subside from his chest and shoulders once 2D's soft pianist fingers caressed his cheek.

At that point, Murdoc finally looked up to meet 2D's gaze, black and serene. 2D could feel his chest heat up and his mind begin to ache in a strangely satisfying way. Murdoc was staring at him the way that he stares at music.

"Ugh!"

The precious almost surreal exchange was broken when Murdoc let out a hideous snarl and grabbed 2D's wrist, snatching it towards his face causing the younger man to shriek in surprise, not sure whether to relax and let Murdoc do what he will or wiggle away in fear.

"What in the bloody hell is all this cack on your hands!" Murdoc yelled, gesturing towards the colourful assortment of nail polish on 2D's fingers. 2D took a long sigh of relief when he realised what the latter was making a fuss about.

"Noodle painted me nails" 2D beamed, wriggling his fingers daintily in Murdoc's direction who grimaced.

"They're blooming awful" he hissed "and you were one to talk about _emasculation…_ "

The green man shook his head and stumbled to his feet, wobbling towards his bedside drawer where he pulled out a small bottle of scarlet liquid and another larger bottle of rubbing alcohol, 2D's slightly stewed eyes following him as he slumped down before the victim, yanking his hand once again and sloppily massaging the alcohol over his painted nails and 2D watched in disappointment as Noodle's friendly pastel pinks, yellows and greens were wiped clean from his fingernails.

"Muds… What is you doin'?" He inquired impatiently though making no notion to move his hands away, rather enjoying the feeling of Murdoc's sharp nails graze against his palm as his calloused fingers carefully handled 2D's soft ones in his own. The bluenette watched in awe at his friend's skillful fingertips hold his hands in his lap and clean every trace of polish off them.

When Murdoc was finished and happy with his work, he brought forth the small bottle of red polish and with his forked tongue poking out between his lips in concentration he did his best to paint 2D's now naked nails whilst admittedly hammered.

2D, now also sharing the warm fuzziness of intoxication didn't question the rather extraordinary activity and instead enjoyed the electrifying feeling of Murdoc squeezing his hands for so long, most likely the longest time he'd ever experienced. If someone were to walk in right now, it would be a very questionable act to see, more so than Murdoc's sex parties.

"If you insist on painting your nails" Murdoc hiccuped "then red is the way to go."

It was noted that Murdoc had a red pinky nail and it must have been confirmed now that he would paint it himself, clearly. However, Murdoc was not painting 2D's pinky as he started with a vibrating hand at his thumb, surprisingly making little mess as he gravitated over each finger, the bright red popping from 2D's porcelain complexion. The singer couldn't help but smile when he realised that red was Murdoc's colour and therefor they'd be matching and he'd be wearing a part of the bassist on his body. Though Noodle might be a little annoyed her work was carelessly wiped clean.

"You're so pretty" Murdoc whispered, avoiding his singer's gaze once again. 2D couldn't help but blush as Murdoc uttered it for a second time, admiring his favourite colour on 2D's slender digits and he blew on the nails softly, his breath strong with alcohol and cigarettes.

Without much sober thought, Murdoc carefully laced his fingers through 2D's and ghosted his lips over the white knuckles, hesitating before he brought them closer and placed gentle kisses on each finger, nuzzling his stubbly cheek against 2D's hand.

"Stu…" Murdoc sighed solemnly and 2D's face reddened even brighter, almost matching his fresh nail lacquer at the mention of his real name. Murdoc was murmuring against Stuart's palm now and his voice cracked.

"I told myself I weren't gonna be like my fuck of a father. But I hurt you all the time, Stu. I knocked half yer face out… I force you to sing for me and drag you around like a puppet. I beat you, I hit you, I kick you, kidnap you, fuck yer girlfriends, make you watch me take all these harlots home. I've seen you _cry_ over me. The worst thing is that I don't ever say sorry to you… But I saw you tonight. I really, _really_ saw you up there on stage and I saw it in yer eyes… How much I hurt you..."

2D swallowed a huge lump in his throat and his hands started shaking in Murdoc's apologetic grip. Here was his hero, shattered to pieces and about to break into tears and already 2D felt he was going to face the same fate, his eyes burning at the sight.

"I'm sorry Stu, I'm so fucking sorry. You have no idea how bad I feel sometimes like when people tell you that you 'ave Swedish syndrome or whatever that thingymajig is and you don't have a clue, alright? You're just so… Stupid but I'm even more stupid. Because you- you love me and I love that you love me because I hate myself, tusspot I truly utterly hate myself. You're the only bloke, the only _person_ who makes me want to stay alive" he took one last breath of pity "and look, you're listenin' to me... Ramble on about myself again. You listen. You ain't like the other girls."

2D was utterly gobsmacked. Even in Murdoc's drunken ramble, he managed to squeeze a few tears out of Stuart who was lost for words, the air knocked right out of him. As if to compose his words, he made a slightly different decision.

Another bold move: 2D placed his hands gently atop Murdoc's shoulder and leant in, pressing his chapped lips softly against Murdoc's and this time, he didn't flinch. Murdoc was completely still as 2D raked his hands through the satanist's hair and pressed his lips more firmly with his captor's until the heat was returned. The bassist noted that his mouth tasted of his favourite rum, his favourite song and his favourite fruit. His favourite everything.

When 2D pulled away, adoration and lust in his deep midnight orbs, Murdoc's lips curved into a small pensive smile.

"Look at you" he ushered, stroking a piece of cerulean hair behind 2D's ear. "You're so beautiful."

The colour quickly returned to his cheeks, intensified by alcohol and the way that Murdoc was staring at him ever so differently than he usually did. The king himself didn't even stare at incredible women the way he was gazing at 2D right now, as if 2D was the physical embodiment of Für Elise or something equally as compelling and musical. Murdoc stroked his cheek once more and leant forward to plant a kiss on Stuart's jaw, slightly wet and sloppy. 2D guessed that Murdoc wasn't really used to being affectionate, especially whilst drunk.

"How did I ever manage to beat you" Murdoc added almost silently.

"I beat you up, too" 2D cut in sympathetically and Murdoc chuckled.

"Only once you nob…"

The two pulled away to gaze into each other's eyes once again and 2D beamed at his bassist, the way a child grins at sweets, the way that sent Murdoc's stone-cold heart into a frenzy of reds and pinks.

"Is okay Murdoc… I know you ain't that good wif your feelin's n that… but I ain't gonna hurt you. You're right, you know? I do love you. I write songs about you all the time n' I jus' want you to know that I don' think you're terrible… you've got a beautiful heart, I know you do. Your dad's a dickhead, you deserved love an-"

2D's words were cut off when Murdoc slapped him lightly across the head and quickly pulled him down into a tight embrace.

"Dents, I truly do hate your accent" he muttered though very unconvincingly and he nuzzled into 2D's neck, inhaling the warm; homely scent of he who laughed like a bluebird's song. "I'm all busted and blue without you, Stuart."


End file.
